"To correct is good, for the mind accepts
correction; not so is reproach, against which
the mind rebels."
___ Colman Mac Beognae, "Apgitir Chabaid"
(trans CM)
Certain kinds of criticism stick in the mind like a thorn. The words of the cleric Colman are specifically addressed to teachers within his monastery, but all who are in positions of authority and responsibility should guard their words carefully, lest reproach rather than correction come to their lips. This is especially true for parents, teachers, and all who deal with the young, who are especially susceptible to reproach. Continued criticism offered in place of helpful suggestions, can over whelm a child and leave her with little self-esteem. Correction shapes technique and eliminates errors over the course of time, until the student himself becomes expert, able to guide and correct in his turn. Reproach, on the other hand, is like lime: whatever it touches immediately shrinks away. Wherever reproach has spread its acid, nothing further grows.
Criticism spring from three desires: a desire to improve, a desire to detract, and a desire to hide the same fault in oneself. The last of these desires is the deadliest: by casting criticism on others, we throw a convenient smoke screen over our own faults, which often perfectly mirror the thing we have pointed at elsewhere. The only way to guard against unwarranted criticism in daily life is to think first, keep silent when possible, and speak only words that will be received without undue offence.
"Consider a recent situation in which you were criticized or you criticized others. Was criticism or reproach used? What wisdom can you learn from the situation?"
[From: "The Celtic Spirit" by Caitlin Matthews]
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